The Great Dog Debate

Every kid wants a dog, right?

They want the cute little puppy, floppy ears, soft bodies. They think, "I can feed a dog!" and "I can walk a dog!"

They don't think so much about, "I can clean up doggy pee out of the carpet," and "I can let a dog chew up my shoes."

I was no different. When my neighbor's dog gave birth to cocker spaniel puppies when I was somewhere in the 3rd grade age, I begged and begged my parents to let me have one. I made all the standard promises of how I would love and care for the dog.

The problem was, I didn't know anything about dogs, and while my parents were willing to own the thing, they didn't want it in the house. That poor animal howled in its pen in the backyard and I rarely went out to play with it. I wanted to, but the truth was, she was super excitable, growing rapidly, and when she was out of her pen, I had no idea what to do with her. I liked her, but, other than putting a cupful of food in her bowl, I didn't know how to take care of her. I didn't understand how to play with her, and when she jumped up on me, or ran away sporadically, I was at a total loss. I came to regret the decision, as I'm sure did my parents. A few months and one classified ad later she was gone, and probably to a much more loving situation.

DH and I have always been clear that we would be a non-dog family. Who wants that responsibility? It's not that we don't like dogs, we just don't want the extra work. Admittedly, I even took smug satisfaction in looking down my nose at all those schmucks who'd strapped themselves down with that burden. When T begged, we told her with no uncertainty that we would never have a dog.

Then one day, a few months back, after watching several friends go from non-dog to pro-dog families, I wondered, just for fun, what kind of dog I would get if I were to get one. "It can't be too yappy and teeny," I would say, "but also not so big that it can't sit on my lap." For funsies I started looking at different breeds, researching temperaments (why did I ever get a cocker spaniel?), reading pros/cons lists. I listened as my friends, even in their exasperation of another spot on the floor, praised their puppies, saying it's totally worth it to them.

I still didn't want one, I said. I just felt better informed.

T started laying heavily into her campaign for a pet. She knew dogs were out of the question and pled daily for a hamster. I groaned and thought, "I think I'd rather have a dog than a hamster!"

That gave me pause (paws?). I'd rather have a dog than a hamster? A dog is a zillion times more work than a hamster. But it seemed like you got a zillion times the reward. Dogs love you. Better than any other animal a dog will always love you.

65% of American homes have a dog. Why? If it's such a pain, why are so many people doing it?

So I sort of started doing more and more research, getting to understand canine mentality, training methods. I found I wanted to stay up at night to watch youtube videos, read doggie forums.

I got a book at the library.

Oh my goodness. I wanted a dog. All my 3rd grade enthusiasm was back. I wanted that ball of fur to love me, to go on walks with me. I longed to be a master, to train a little puppy to follow my commands. I was comforted by the idea that in three years, when all my kids are at school and I spend hours alone in this house, I'd have a companion.

DH was chagrined by my change of heart, but, true to form, willing to consider the possibility. He likes to make people happy.

I had narrowed down the breeds I liked down to two or three, though I understood that each had its drawbacks.

Long story shorter, we picked a puppy, named him, bought all the stuff for him. He was a little male pug we named Harvey and the kids were so excited, T especially. We went to visit him and committed to a day to pick him up.

I found the visit unsettling, however. There was a lot of shed hair at the owner's house and DH was clearly not enthused. He was willing, but he didn't really want to do it. I posted on FB about the possibility, and received comments and emails that again gave me pause (paws?).

I started to get cold feet. I still wanted the dog, but I feared how having a dog might change my relationships. Would people now see me as the schmuck strapped down with a burden? Would people not want to come to my house? Would our families resent the dog?

Would DH?

Would I?

I cried all night and cancelled the dog in the morning. We hadn't paid for him yet and he was easily placed later that day.

It was a good decision, I said. No potty training. No worrying about what to do with a dog when we travel. No extra expense. No hair on my couch. DH was visibly relieved.

So my question is, if it's such a good decision, why do I still want one?